Monday, April 30, 2012

The Other Side Of Fear

Although not proud to admit it, there have been many times in my life that fear - of the unsure, of the unclear, of the unfamiliar – provided the obstacle that kept me from reaching God’s best. While He has always straightened the path I tried my hardest to make crooked, or weaved His perfect plans into my super sorry ones, I undoubtedly know that blessings have been missed because I was afraid.

This past weekend, Mary Mac and I participated in a mother/daughter weekend at Camp Skyline Ranch, a Christian summer camp for girls.

And I really didn’t want to go.

Not because I don’t love spending time with my sweet girl, who is all sunshine and giggles as well as drama and delight.  And it wasn’t because it was going to be in a bunk room setting, when I prefer hotel beds with high thread count and lounge chairs with poolside service.

I didn’t want to go because I wanted to stay with my family, in the comfortable confines of my home, protected from all that could happen, or could injure or could cause more harm. I wanted an eye on all of my people at all times as though a steady, well-intentioned gaze was enough to keep everyone safe.

At the invitation of my good friend, C, and the urging of my husband, I was convinced last minute to take the overnight trip with my daughter. Even as I travelled to the camp with my friend and our daughters, I wondered if I would be present enough for the weekend to matter, if worry would steal yet another moment that should have been carefree instead of concerned.

Upon arrival at the camp, I discovered rather quickly that many of the activities would directly address not only my own fears, but those of my daughter’s.  Stretched beyond self-imposed limits and catapulted out of all reasonable zones of comfort, we tried new adventures with shaky knees and quivering lips as well as suspect bladders.

And it was thrilling.

And carefree. 

And worth the fear.

With each activity the two of us successfully accomplished, it became clear that it wasn’t the height that momentarily paralyzed us, or the potential speed that caused temporary trembles.  It was taking that first step towards the fear of the unknown, hoping it would end well on the other side.

And it did.

Every time.

While the weekend was short, the lessons learned were long-lasting. Try the new, improve the old.  Step towards the future with faith, allowing steps of the past to be reminiscent of God’s faithfulness. Move towards the difficult even though the journey won’t be easy.

On the other side of fear are blessings, whether for me or for someone else. On the other side of fear is joy, whether for me or on the behalf of others. On the other side of fear is purpose, whether for me or someone searching for their own.

Even though this path I am on is uncertain, days I don’t know if I am going to fly or if I will fall, I know that God’s goodness, His mercy, and faithfulness are on the other side of fear.

And that is where I will be my best.

1 comment:

LJ said...

Love the Blog!! We sure are glad you and MaryMac spent the weekend up on the mountain. It was fun to see ya'll have such a good time and experience the circus and the rest of camp. Can't wait till Summer!!
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